It's Never Too Early For A Report Card

My Avs are five games into the season. Five SCARY moments. So far, this season has been a stressful one for any Av fan, especially myself. There have been a couple surprises both positive and negative, a couple of heartbreaking moments, and a whole lot of nervously bitten nails. Do I remain optimistic? Absolutely. But... do I also think I need to buckle up for a long, tumultuous season? Without a doubt.

The Avs were off to rough start: 0-3. What makes it worse was all three games were one-goal games, and all three were lost in the final moments of the 3rd period. Their second game, for example, was lost to the Oilers with five seconds left. That destroys team confidence. Peter Budaj, who got his starting job back after Jose Theodore left, lost all three of those games and is now sitting with a nasty 4.38 GAA and .824 save %. Ouch. Big ouch.

Now the big surprise: Both their games have been won by none other than Andrew Raycroft. Yeah, that Andrew Raycroft. The bane of the Leafs? The guy they bought out? Yeah, that guy. In hiis first game he gave up 2 goals, one on a penalty shot and the other on a 5-on-3 power play. The 2nd game wasn't so great, giving up 4 goals to slumping Dallas. He's sporting a 3.00 GAA and .875 sv %, surely not superstar numbers... but better than Budaj. Hey, at least they're finally winning games... They're 2-3, and I'll take a 2 game winning streak over a 3 game losing streak any day. My goaltender prediction continues: The Avs will win games, but they will be close games that are characterized by a high score. We're talking 6-5, 5-4 type games as the Avs will have to struggle every single night with quite possibly the worst goaltending tandem in the NHL. Those sweet memories of Patrick Roy are fading faster than ever... If the Avs want to go ANYWHERE in the playoffs, they will either pull a Jose Theodore out of Budaj or Raycroft, or else pick up some goaltending help (Nikolai Khabibulin, anyone?).

The pleasant surprise has been the Avs scorers. 39 year-old Joe Sakic, the ageless wonder, shares the team lead in points with Paul Stastny with eight points in five games. And Milan Hejduk, who has underachieved since his 50-goal campaign of years past, has five goals in five games. With a potent scoring unit, the Avs should be able to match and hopefully best all the tallies their opponents will score on them. Let's not forget the Avs' underrated defense, which often seems worse than it really is because of the goaltending situation.

If everyone can stay healthy, it shouldn't be a bad season.

The Captains Are In...

As you've probably figured out, I've developed a sort of obsession with the captains of the NHL. With the season starting yesterday (and my Avs falling 5-4 to the Bruins, little bro Josh is going to give me crap for months), rosters were finalized and the captains role solidified. During some past entries, I wrote about who SHOULD be captains of some teams, and I'm satisfied to say that some coaches obviously read Thackalanche and took my advice. Here are the captains and alternates for each team this season, with some editorial comments for some teams based solely on my I-can't-believe-I'm-up-this-early-at-work-on-Friday attitude.

Anaheim Ducks
Captain: Scott Niedermayer
Alternates: Chris Pronger, Ryan Getzlaf
I was happy to see Niedermayer to get the captaincy back. He's without a doubt the heart and soul of this team. Also cool to see Getzlaf getting the chance to be a leader, as he is the future of this club.

Atlanta Thrashers
Captain: None
Alternates: Ilya Kovalchuk, Vycheslav Kozlov, Niclas Havelid, Mathieu Schneider, Colby Armstrong
I'm always kind of disappointed when a team does this - names no captain but a bunch of alternates. Call me old-school, but I like to see someone in the position leading his troops. Perhaps coach John Anderson is just waiting for someone to step up and claim the captaincy. That person will eventually be Kovalchuk or Armstrong

Boston Bruins
Captain: Zdeno Chara
Alternates: Patrice Bergeron, Marco Sturm, Andrew Ference, PJ Axelsson
I refuse to say anything about the Bruins after last night's game.

Buffalo Sabres
Captain: Craig Rivet
Alternates: Jason Pominville, Jochen Hecht, Teppo Numminen, Jaroslav Spacek
Rivet will do great leading by his hard work ethic, and is a good example for Pominville (future captain) to follow.

Calgary Flames
Captain: Jarome Iginla
Alternates: Robyn Regehr, Todd Bertuzzi, Dion Phaneuf
Bertuzzi was wearing an "A" during the first game of the season, which surprised me. Who knows if he'll remain an alternate. Craig Conroy's also been wearing one.

Carolina Hurricans
Captain: Rod Brind'Amour
Alternates: Eric Staal, Ray Whitney
Brind'Amour, a.k.a. the Missing Link, is still one of the game's all-time great leaders

Chicago Blackhawks
Captain: Jonathan Toews
Alternates: Duncan Keith, Patrick Sharp
Watching the Hawks this year will be like watching an episode of Rugrats - Except for the fact that these guys are DANG good hockey players.

Colorado Avalanche
Captain: Joe Sakic
Alternates: Adam Foote, Ian Laperriere
In terms of leaders who lead by example and sacrifice 100% for their team, there's none better than these three guys. The ultimate team players

Columbus Blue Jackets
Captain: Rick Nash
Alternates: Frederick Modin, Rostislav Klesla

Dallas Stars
Captain: Brendan Morrow
Alternates: Mike Modano, Sergei Zubov
Morrow is turning into one of the game's premier leaders. I'm finally seeing why they stripped Modano of the captaincy to give it to Morrow. It all makes sense now...

Detroit Red Wings
Captain: Niklas Lidstrom
Alternates: Kris Draper, Henrik Zetterberg, Pavel Datsyuk

Edmonton Oilers
Captain: Ethan Moreau
Alternates: Ales Hemsky, Shawn Horcoff, Sheldon Souray, Steve Staios

Florida Panthers
Captain: none
Alternates: Stephen Weiss, Bryan Allen, Cory Stillman
Expect Weiss to be named captain someday, just not this day

Los Angeles Kings
Captain: Dustin Brown
Alternates: Anze Kopitar, Matt Greene
The Kings are going way young in their leadership, which could go both ways. Do these three have what it takes to guide this team through yet another tough season?

Minnesota Wild
Captain: rotating
Alternates: Andrew Brunette, Mikko Koivu
Great choices for alternates. I'm getting kind of bored of the whole rotating captaincy thing, I say name Koivu permanent captain and be done with it.

Montreal Canadiens
Captain: Saku Koivu
Alternates: Chris Higgins, Alexei Kovalev
Exactly the same as last year. When you've got a good thing going, why change?

Nashville Predators
Captain: Jason Arnott
Alternates: JP Dumont, Steve Sullivan
Sullivan continues to be a captain on paper only due to his injury. Last year, Martin Erat and Greg DeVries wore the "A" in his place.

New York Islanders
Captain: Bill Guerin
Alternates: Brendan Witt, Mike Sillinger
Richard Park wears the "A" in Sillinger's place

New York Rangers
Captain: Chris Drury
Alternates: Scott Gomez, Markus Naslund
I called this one!

Ottawa Senators
Captain: Daniel Alfredsson
Alternates: Chris Philips, Dany Heatley

Philadelphia Flyers
Captain: Mike Richards
Alternates: Kimmo Timonen, Simon Gagne
Called this one too!

Phoenix Coyotes
Captain: Shane Doan
Alternates: Ed Jovanovski, Derek Morris

Pittsburgh Penguins
Captain: Sidney Crosby
Alternates: Sergei Gonchar, Evgeni Malkin, Brooks Orpik

San Jose Sharks
Captain: Patrick Marleau
Alternates: Joe Thornton, Mike Grier
If Patrick Marleau is still trade bait, expect Thornton to be named captain in his stead

St. Louis Blues
Captain: Eric Brewer
Alternates: Keith Tkachuk, Paul Kariya, Barrett Jackman
The problem with the Blues is that they just seem old and tired, or young and inexperienced. It's going to be a long season

Tampa Bay Lightning
Captain: Vincent Lecavalier
Alternates: Martin St. Louis, Andrej Meszaros

Toronto Maple Leafs
Captain: None
Alternates: Nik Antropov, Tomas Kaberle, Pavel Kubina, Jamal Mayers, Dominic Moore
Let's face it, filling the Mats Sundin leadership void isn't easy.

Vancouver Canucks
Captain: Roberto Luongo
Alternates: Ryan Kesler, Willie Mitchell, Mattias Ohlund
A goalie as captain. Awesome. Simply awesome.

Washington Capitals
Captain: Chris Clark
Alternates: Alexander Ovechkin, Donald Brashear
Clark is a fantastic leader, but Ovechkin is the heart and soul of this team, perhaps of the whole city

"Hate" is such a strong word, but...

This post may be a bit of rant. It may seem out of character, and it may seem childish and inconsiderate. Some might say, "but you don't really KNOW these people, how can you talk about them this way?" I don't really care. I'm a pretty easygoing guy, and pretty adept at finding the good in people and liking them for that goodness. But boy, there are just a few guys that I CANNOT STAND. They pull me chain, they rub me the wrong way, they bug the crap out of me, whatever you want to call it. I simply do not like them. Interestingly, they're all defensemen, just like me.

I know you've waited a long time for this, so here it is, my top 3 least favorite players in the NHL:

#3: Chris-Waste-Of-Pure-Hockey-Talent-Pronger

Physically, Chris Pronger is everything you want in a hockey player, especially a defenseman. He's huge (6'6, 214 lbs) and hits like Warren Sapp on speed. His size also lends to a good skating ability; he's not the smoothest skater, but that huge, Clydesdale stride helps him cover a lot of space in a short amount of time. He's also extremely gifted offensively with a booming shot. During the power play, it's common to see him alone at the top of the blueline, mid-ice, just waiting for that one-timer. Apparently, he's also a good leader, having been a captain or alternate captain on every team he's played for (St. Louis captain, Edmonton alternate, Anaheim captain/alternate). So why am I hating on him? Because he wastes every bit of talent he has by playing sloppy and dirty. He hooks, he carves, he punches, and evidenced by last year's little incident, he steps on other players... remembering that when hockey players step on someone, they have a BLADE on the bottom of their foot! He's been suspended a whopping eight times in his career. EIGHT. Every time he says he's sorry, that he's "not that type of player"... Well Chris, you obviously are if you've been suspended that many times. The biggest thing for me I guess is the disappointment, he's an incredibly gifted player who just wastes all that talent on cheap shots and consistently dirty play. Like I said in a past entry about Pronger, he's like the really smart kid in school who cheats just because he knows he can get away with it. It's too bad.

#2: Scott-Rules-Don't-Apply-To-Me-Stevens

Scott Stevens might just be the dirtiest player I have ever watched play hockey. And he does it all under the guise of this blue-collar, silent type. Sorry Mr. Stevens, not fooling me. It's one thing to play hockey, it's another thing to play dirty. Scott Stevens was a good hockey player when he wanted to be, but he was dirty. Consistently. Most point to his hit on Paul Kariya in the Stanley Cup Finals. I'm still a little unsure about that one... for me it's all the little things he did on a consistent basis to get his way no matter what. Hockey is a game. It's not a war, it's not Ultimate Fighting, as much as people want it to be. The game has rules which makes it more enjoyable. Rules never applied to Scott Stevens apparently. Never. My favorite moments were in the 2001 Stanley Cup Finals. First, Scott Stevens tries to go in to the boards with the smaller Joe Sakic (my favorite player all-time). Sakic lowers his shoulder and BOOM, knocks Stevens over! The look on Stevens face as he lay on the ice was probably a lot like Goliath's when David nailed him. Then what happens, in Game 7 Sakic has the puck right in front of Stevens... He jukes one way, jukes the other, then puts a shot right through Steven's legs and into the net. Pure beauty. Pure karma.

#1: Chris-You-Are-Everything-Bad-About-This-Sport-Chelios

Sure he's the oldest player in the league, and sure he's been around the block a few times. I don't care. Chris Chelios, while not being quite as dirty as Pronger or Stevens, is ten times the whiner of any player in the league. This guy whines as much as most people talk in a given day. It's just constant jabbering at the officials or other players. When he's not on the ice, he's whining about how he's not getting enough playing time. Hello?! You're 46 years old, Chris! There's a reason you're not playing that much: You're not as good as the other defensemen on the team. Chris is lucky the Wings have kept him around this long, because judging by his play, particularly in last year's playoffs, he definitely doesn't have what it takes to continue to be a full-time player in the NHL. In last season's Conference Finals, I swear I saw just about every member of the Dallas Stars skate around Chelios. And where was he during the Cup Finals? Oh yeah, didn't play. Then, who's the third player to hoist the Cup after the Wings won it last year? Yep, Chelios. The guy who didn't even PLAY in the Finals gets the Cup ahead of heroes like Zetterberg, Datsyuk, Rafalski and Osgood who did all the work. Sure, he wants to chase his dream of playing until he's 50 million years old, but does he really want to do that at the expense of his team? Stop whining Chris. You're the oldest, most experienced player in the league, the NHL's elder statesman. Act like it.

Disclaimer: I am a pretty loving person. Really.

Captain Canuck...Welcome, Mr. Luongo

In an unprecedented move, the Vancouver Canucks named Roberto Luongo their captain. Some people certainly don't like it, and it's technically against league rules, but I think it's freaking brilliant.

Luongo is by far the team's best player and a natural choice for leader. As I've thought about who on the Canucks roster could be the captain that could really take the team on his shoulders and carry them to new heights, I was drawing a black-hole sized blank. Like no body came to mind. Ryan Kesler is an answer, but not for another couple years. Luongo is by far the best choice.

Luongo's captaincy rubs against the grain slightly. NHL rule book rule 6.1 says: "No playing coach or playing manager or goalkeeper shall be permitted to act as captain or alternate captain." The underlying reason is they don't want the goalie constantly leaving the crease to talk to the officials, stuff like that. The Canucks work around this by letting Luongo serve as captain more in the spirit of the law rather than the letter. He will serve as the undisputed leader of the team, but will not officially wear a "C". The Canucks will compensate for this by having three alternate captains: Ryan Kesler, Willie Mitchell, and Mattias Ohlund.

A great move by the Canucks. Kesler, Mitchell and Ohlund can more than handle on-ice issues and Luongo can serve as the type of leader the Canucks need. He gives 100% every night, and his quiet but diligent example should really help the young, thin Canucks team who will need more than a little inspiration just to be competitive each night.

I know Luongo's probably the last guy on the planet who cares about this, but why not let goalies where the "C"? Not wanting them to cause additional time-outs to come talk to the refs is a stupid reason. Just let them wear it if they are the leaders of the team. Why not?